In a Federal Register notice published today, the Navy advertised the availability of ex-U.S.S. John F. Kennedy (CV 67), presently located at the Navy's Inactive Ships Maintenance Office, Philadelphia, PA. for donation as a museum/memorial.  The Navy notes that eligible recipients may include any State, Commonwealth, or possession of the U.S. or any municipal corporation or political subdivision thereof.  Should the Navy receive no interest within two years for donation of the ship, the notice states, the Navy may remove the vessel from donation consideration and proceed with disposal. 

That's fine and well, but here's a modest proposal for consideration in light of our tight economic times and tough defense recapitalization choices: let's scuttle the Kennedy for fun and funding... Tough times require novel solutions.   Here's the plan: 

(1) Have our best and brightest find a deep-dark eco-friendly final resting site for the Kennedy, a place in need of a reef or "structure" for marine life.  Just outside the Port of Philadelphia works for me.

(2) Commence with sinking the Kennedy on a pay-per-shot, highest-bidder basis.  We'll subject her to some real live fire testing with every dollar in the kitty going towards her replacement. 

-- Wanna strafe the deck in your Cessna with hastily-mounted guns ablazing?    How about operating the 20mm cannon as a F-16D backseater?  We can work it out. 

-- How about looking down through the bombsight on a vintage B-17 bomber and letting loose with a 500lb. bomb?  Something you made in your garage?    What the heck, write a check.

-- How about squeezing the trigger on a JDAM or SDB from a B-52 or even a B-2?  No more nukes until we use the ones we got.

And why leave the fun to the airborne? 

-- Care to launch a Exocet missile or Penguin torpedo from your Boston Whaler?  100% of your tax-deductible donation would go towards shortening DoD's pending acquisition holiday.

-- How about squeezing the trigger on a few 155mm rounds in a true pay-to-play game of Battleship?  Now that's reality television.

Bottom line: Rather than the painful disassembly and protracted conversion of this proud ship into razor blades over a dozen years as she rusts in place, I can't think of a more fitting salute to the Kennedy's 38 years of service -- and to the thousands who served aboard her -- than to assign her to the deep blue sea while restocking the Treasury.  Its worth a thought.